The Black Swan Behind (Beauty of Fire)

Emma glanced at the guy who was busy writing notes beside her, “Um.. Roger, can I borrow an eraser?”

Roger didn’t answer. As usual, he just passed the eraser over to Emma’s desk without even looking at her.

“Thanks,” Emma said by erasing unimportant writing that she had written to delete. When she was done, she gave it back to Roger, “Sorry if I borrowed your eraser again. The one you gave me that time is gone.” she explained.

“Oh.. Gosh! I haven’t even replaced your eraser yet, have I?” She pretended to pat her forehead.

“No need,” The guy said coldly.

Emma shook her head, “You can’t do that. I don’t really like being in debt to other people. If I say I’m going to replace it, then I’ll replace it.”

Roger again didn’t answer so the problem wouldn’t get any longer. He just sighed, shaking his head tiredly.

.....

“Oh, if you want, can you accompany me to the stationery shop on the ground floor? I’ll also buy an eraser to replace yours.” Emma asked with a hopeful face.

Roger looked straight at her then shook his head quickly, “I don’t want to. Give me the eraser any time.”

“I beg you, Roger. I will be confused about which eraser you like. You know.. women are like that, right? Confused when choosing things.” Emma persuaded.

“Just take the cheapest one, or whatever. I don’t care.”

“How could I just take..” Emma said.

“Ehem.. Emma? Your name is Emma Hilland, ??right? And you, Roger Timothy.”

The girl immediately turned her face to the front, “Yes, Prof?” she answered awkwardly.

“Don’t you two want to be in my class? If my class is too boring for you to keep talking like that, you two can leave.” Said the woman with thick glasses. Her name was Prof. Natalia. The lecturer was famous for being fierce and snobby.

Roger glanced at Emma with an annoyed look. That girl always brought him trouble.

Emma stuttered in response to Prof. Nathalia, “I-I’m sorry, Prof, I was just ..”

“Please get out now, while I still haven’t thought about leaving your course scores empty.” Cut the woman.

Emma pursed her lips immediately. She turned to Roger with a face full of guilt. But like it or not, the two of them finally left the class.

From behind, Calvin Lee watched the incident with a sad face. How could Roger be so close to Emma? What exactly did that guy have that the other men didn’t that attract Emma to him?

“If I were in Roger’s shoes, that would be great,” Calvin muttered. Then he tapped his head lightly with the tip of the pen to wake himself up. All this time, Calvin had never thought of swapping positions with other people. But sometimes, Roger made him think like that. But indeed, for Calvin, Roger was very lucky to be that close to Emma.

“Roger, I’m really sorry. I’ll borrow Calvin’s notes later and share them with you too.” Emma said by chasing Roger’s steps in the campus corridor.

Roger sighed. This was the only time in his life, he was kicked out of class by the lecturer. Then, he turned to face Emma, ??”No need. Please.. Please don’t stick to me all the time.” Roger looked surprised by the words that came out of his own mouth.

Roger said the same thing Poppy had told him. It was very painful. Why should he do the same to other people?, “S-sorry. I didn’t mean to push you away. But...” Roger was confused to give an excuse.

Emma smiled gently. She knew that Roger must have felt guilty because he had been in the same position as Emma now.

It was very painful when you cared about someone, but that person pushed you away.

“You don’t need to apologize, Roger. I know you feel uncomfortable about me. And.. maybe, you feel annoyed with the people who are always surrounding me.” Emma said.

Roger nodded, “I’m sorry if I haven’t been able to be honest with you. I’m not a very talkative person. I hope you could understand, Emma. With me around, it can be dangerous for you.. and me also. The boys don’t like it if I’m friends with you. You know.. they will bully me even more because of that.” He laughed bashfully as he scratched his didn’t itch head.

“R-really?!” Emma said surprised. As for that last reason, she really didn’t realize it. How stupid! Emma always forgot that Roger would be bullied even more for being around her!, “I’m really sorry about that, Roger. I didn’t realize it.”

Roger shook his head, “It’s okay, Emma. I know you’re a nice woman. But our worlds are too different. I’m not the right friend for you. You can depend on Calvin Lee or the others. As male friends, they can protect you well. And also, they won’t get you into trouble. I’m just a freak guy who’s always bullied. Don’t trouble yourself by being friends with someone like me.” he explained slowly.

Emma could hear the sad tone in Roger’s voice. It must be painful to be in his position.

Emma nodded, “Okay. I understand, Roger. I won’t be around you anymore. But.. even so, I still consider you my friend. And always will be.”

If only Roger wasn’t a coward. If only he could overcome his fear. If only he was a normal guy. Maybe right now, he was laughing with Emma and the others and.. Poppy in his arms. But it was all just a supposing that happened in his dream only.

“Thanks, Emma. Goodbye.” Roger said turning around and walking away.

Emma let out a long, heavy sigh. Was that what it felt like to be dumped by the person she liked? It appeared to be very uncomfortable.

“Ugh...” Emma muttered as she stepped in the opposite direction to Roger. Even though she had been expelled, she would not stop her intention to stalk Roger.

A pair of oriental eyes stared at the girl in brown boots who had just walked past her while contemplating. She returned her position to its original place. Because, previously, she was hiding behind an ornamental plant.

“Looks like Emma is getting closer to Roger. That’s good, isn’t it?” She mumbled with a faint smile. But her innocent eyes couldn’t lie. There was a sense of sadness over the jealousy.

Poppy pressed against her aching chest. In all her life, she had never seen Roger smile since that incident. It turned out, his smile was still the same as before. Very sweet. And it was Emma who was able to bring that smile to Roger’s face.

Even though she couldn’t hear their conversation, Poppy could see that Roger felt comfortable with Emma. He must have had feelings for her. Poppy longed to be happy for Roger. But her heart could not do it. And.. after everything she had done to Roger, should her heart still be pounding when she saw the man close to another woman?

***

Roger strode swiftly through the snow-covered streets of Handway City. There could be seen the shop owners along the street were busy cleaning their shop yard where the snow had piled up again. He continued to walk as if the cold air did not feel at all on his skin. The heat of anger had long since burned him from within.

But Roger didn’t notice, a few meters behind, there was a pair of feet stamping on his footprints. A woman with her hair tied down in a low ponytail with her head covered in a winter hat, a fur coat with a high collar that zips up to the top, and thick round glasses, was following him.

Emma didn’t look like the usual Emma Hilland. She looked more like a mom with three school kids. Her body was heavily covered in a strange style as if she was very afraid of the cold. Well.. this was Emma’s first time spying on someone. She combined several clothes that made her look strange.

Roger stepped into a small, deserted seafood tavern. He sat down at a small table. Not long after, Emma came in and sat at the table behind the guy’s back. Roger seemed to be waiting for someone.

Emma sat with her back to Roger. And the guy was not aware at all. Thinking Emma was just an old woman who didn’t know fashion.

Emma looked around the room. The tavern looked a bit rundown. The number of the tables was also small. The owner was an old granny who looked quite healthy. But Emma could judge, maybe the granny opened the tavern just to spend her old days. On her wrinkled body, stuck the fine clothes that Emma could see were from some pretty expensive brand.

Suddenly, the doorbell rang and the outside air rushed in. Emma knew the door had closed again when the strong wind stopped blowing from outside. Then, she heard the sound of a stool shifting behind her. The person Roger had been waiting for had arrived.

“Good afternoon. Can I take your order?” Emma gasped when she realized that the tavern owner’s granny was standing beside her.

“Oh..” Emma hastily covered her mouth for fear that Roger would recognize her voice. Then, Emma opened the menu book and pointed to a picture of crab soup and a bottle of Sake. She hastily pointed at her own throat and moved her palm, “S-Sorry, my throat is sore,” she said in a small, hoarse voice.

“Ah.. Alright. I will prepare your order. Please wait,” The granny nodded kindly. Then, she stopped at the table behind Emma and took note of the two men’s orders which turned out to be only two bottles of beer and a plate of fried squid.

Emma was curious about the man sitting at the same table as Roger. Because of that, she pretended to go to the cashier’s desk to ask for a napkin. Emma secretly glanced at the man who was chatting with Roger, sitting facing inward. The girl was quite surprised to see the appearance of the man who looked like a member of a gangster.

“Did you bring the stuff?” Roger asked sternly. Even though he was actually afraid of the man with the long straight wound on his right cheek.

The man nodded and took out a piece of paper from inside his old thick jacket. Although he looked scary with the back of his hands full of tattoos, he looked like a bum and.. one of his legs was limping.